US Customs agents expose guitars as "cunning" fakes

[Greg McCoy]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/transportation/2021/06/21/these-guitars-struck-wrong-note-with-us-customs-border-protection-officers/

WaPo at it again with their highly questionable brand of feel good journalism.

Good thing these Sherlock Holmes types are on our side.

Also, yes, obviously every single Slash product carrying a decal with a photocopy of his signature is an actual autograph.

I don't know who should win the prize here. The Customs Agents who exposed these nearly indiscernible criminal doppelgangers, or the WaPo reporter who couldn't use google to figure out that a "signature model" is not the same thing as an "autographed" object.

[Leon]

[Shawn]

Wow.

[beneharris]

Oh man

[Greg McCoy]

That's probably the worst job you can have at Gibson, the guy who has to deal with US Customs asking for help verifying obviously fake guitars are fake.

Your duties include:

-Not pointing out that the "Oxblood" finish isn't actually made with biohazardous Ox Blood, so it's unclear exactly where the health and safety risk is here. That would rain on the parade of this bit of bizarre back patting.



-Not bursting out laughing when US Customs claims they might have a case when the headstocks are obviously weirdly proportioned and Gibson is possibly misspelled.

-Letting US Customs think they kept ~$300k of fake Gibsons off the street. Like they actually would have sold for that.

-Not bursting out laughing when US Customs says, "We aren't supposed to be telling you this, but we are also wrapping up a top secret ten year investigation into some fake Fenders being made in Mexico. Everyone knows real Fenders are made in America."

-Not implicating your own dudes by mentioning that Slashes most famous "Gibson" Les Paul is actually also a fake Gibson and the "autographs" on the real Gibsons are also "Fake" reproductions after US Customs assures you it takes the crimes of fake Gibson decals and fake autographs VERY seriously.

-Attempting to keep a straight face when the experts from the US Customs fake guitar unit send you a sketch they have made of their top suspect.



I feel like US Customs could have just outsourced this one to a legally blind average ebay user and better used their resources for something else.

[jacksonplayer]

I don't know, the cheese grater frets on a Chibson could theoretically be dangerous to one's fingers. Thank goodness our Border Heroes are on the case.

[Naren]

I read that article yesterday and those were the two parts that really stuck out to me. 1. Those didn't look like autographs, so I was wondering why the article was referring to them as autographs, and 2. "Counterfeit goods pose a serious health and safety risk to American consumers." Was there something I missed? They never mentioned the counterfeits being made out of biologically hazardous materials or nuclear waste or whatever.

[jacksonplayer]

I read that article yesterday and those were the two parts that really stuck out to me. 1. Those didn't look like autographs, so I was wondering why the article was referring to them as autographs, and 2. "Counterfeit goods pose a serious health and safety risk to American consumers." Was there something I missed? They never mentioned the counterfeits being made out of biologically hazardous materials or nuclear waste or whatever.

I'm sure that's just standard agency PR boilerplate. They'd probably say the same crap if they confiscated a pallet of counterfeit wristwatches.

[JJ Rodriguez]

I read that article yesterday and those were the two parts that really stuck out to me. 1. Those didn't look like autographs, so I was wondering why the article was referring to them as autographs, and 2. "Counterfeit goods pose a serious health and safety risk to American consumers." Was there something I missed? They never mentioned the counterfeits being made out of biologically hazardous materials or nuclear waste or whatever.

I'm assuming those guitars would cause cancer in California since everything else does. Someone really needs to look into why everything causes cancer there.

[Mike]

I'm sure that's just standard agency PR boilerplate. They'd probably say the same crap if they confiscated a pallet of counterfeit wristwatches.

Oh, it definitely is. My DC-Speak filter just edited it right out.