Caption the photo

[desertdweller]

[noodles]

“Next week, on Between Two Ferns…”

[scole]

"No- I'm not in the witness protection program. Why do you ask?.."

[mpexus]

Got a Black Suit to match my fake Black Hair and Beard

[Iron1]

"Sure my headstock is fugly, but... who are you again?"

[Alan]

"Look at my gorgeous bespoke shovel, crafted of the finest woods and metals. It pairs beautifully with my 30 year old single malt scotch."

[Randy]

....Satan...

[Soopahmahn]

That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.

[Mike]

"Yes, I *am* Nicholas Cage."

[Budda]

No man, the cork has to be imported from Italy or it’s not the same.

[Darren]

Looks like an ad for Poppa John’s Artisanal Beard And Fretboard Oil

[noodles]

"I'll give you ten."

"That's more like it...TEN!?! Are you trying to insult me? Me, with a poor dying grandmother?"

[Drew]

Is the Trooch in this month's Aficionado Magazine?

I kinda thought swilling whiskey while playing Mesas was my thing.

[Überschall]

Rich Corinthian Leather

[Soopahmahn]

Is the Trooch in this month's Aficionado Magazine?

I kinda thought swilling whiskey while playing Mesas was my thing.

No, swilling whiskey while not releasing albums and breaking the server is your thing.

[Drew]

No, swilling whiskey while not releasing albums and breaking the server is your thing.

What do you think I'm spending all my time doing to stop me from releasing albums and fixing servers?

[Soopahmahn]

What do you think I'm spending all my time doing to stop me from releasing albums and fixing servers?

Fuckin' Drew

[Mike]

This thread hath delivered.

[Naren]

"Yes, I *am* Nicholas Cage."

Glad I'm not the only one who saw this picture and thought "NICOLAS CAGE!"

[pjr]

No man, the cork has to be imported from Italy or it’s not the same.

Tuscany to be precise.

[jacksonplayer]

Petrucci at the Sands

[Adam]

"yeah, no, you can really taste the beard oil."

[Chris]

"The secret is using the same dye for my hair, beard, shoes AND fretboard, you see."

[Chris]

So because I was bored, I googled "John Petrucci looks ridiculous" and found this on Reddit regarding some beef between JP and some dude named Mike Stone who absolutely nobody recognizes as the current guitarist of Queensryche.

"Those lyrics [As I Am] were directly inspired by some of the mumblings going on backstage on that tour with Queensrÿche," reveals Mike [Portnoy]. "And especially their new guitar player Mike Stone. He would make comments like those [referring to Tate's Classic Rock interview where Tate said that Queensrÿche concentrates on songs, while Dream Theater concentrates on how many notes they can play]. He would be giving John Petrucci tips. This is coming from a hired gun who hasn't done anything in his career, and he's giving John tips? I find that to be the most insulting thing I've ever heard of. I wouldn't say it was insulting if it was somebody that was doing it nicely, but he was doing it pompously. And it's like hello? You're telling John how to bend a note? Give me a break."

And all of this made me chuckle, because it tells the tale that this guy:



Spends his time writing mean poetry about some dude who didn't appreciate his chops.

JP is basically the Microtonal Metal Guy who wrote the song about us hating on his band spam. Glorious.

[jacksonplayer]

And all of this made me chuckle, because it tells the tale that this guy:



Spends his time writing mean poetry about some dude who didn't appreciate his chops.

"How dare you talk to me that way. I went to Berklee!"